Ask...

... And you shall receive...

Grandma Q always knows the answer... She should start her own column, until then I will share her insight as it comes:

Hi Nat,

I just read your blog. I have to respond to your question with a question. Why wouldn't you want to get married in a Catholic church? Yes God is everywhere. He has given us much beauty to enjoy. The Rose Garden is beautiful,but it isn't a consecrated,holy place where the Blessed Sacrament is present. My way of thinking is that the Sacrament of Matrimony should take place in aholy place where the Blessed Sacrament is present. most catholic churches are beautiful, but more important the Blessed Sacrament is present.

Perhaps I am missing something, but I have always believed it wasn't about the length of the aisle you walked, the music or the clothes worn { you can pretty much have a choice there}. To me it is about the commitment you make to God [to death do us part} and to each other;and to be witnessed by a Catholic priest in a sacred holy place where the Blessed Sacrament is present.

... Good enough for me grams... Stay tuned for more on his Word

~Capt. Q.

Holy Snot! That's a whole lot of commitment!

I've returned.

My absence is over and I am hoping to perhaps be better at keeping up a blog now that I have graduated. Although my blog has been silent, I feel as though the holy spirit has been working in mysterious ways the last few months. I made it my personal goal to start truly treating others the way I wanted to be treated (This was prompted by church and my experience reading the book "the secret" and dong research on the writers).

My biggest conflict I struggle with the institution of church now seems to be our stance on the whole with the sacrament of marriage. My sister just recently married (3 days ago) and, while I loved the service and it was fitting for her, something inside me was very upset at the thought of being married in a church. What if I want it outside? While Catholicism is something I love and identify with, I just can't see myself wanting to be married in a church when god has granted us such beautiful, natural structures (I have also been slowly becoming a hippie, see my other blogs).

Also, What is it about the music??? I thought marriage was supposed to be a celebration, and yet there was nothing in the singing that went on in her Service that really sad "CELEBRATE!" other than of course, an alleiluia. Again, this was a fitting choice of music for my sister, but I couldn;t see myself being satisfied with that for my own celebration.

Does anyone know what the protocol is? Could I have a catholic service that was small and than a big Fat service that was more joyous? If anyone knows the answer, I would be More than happy to know.

Jesus said "love one another", and if that is what it takes, there was certainly love in the room, at her wedding!

~Capt. Q.

Guess what kids? It doesn't need to be 1960 to make it a hate crime.

Not even a year ago, a colleague of mine was graduating from a society that I frequently have referred to as my own.  We, this society, have PRIDED ourselves on being a group of people who are "humanitarians" and "diverse" in our circle.  When this friend of mine spoke at the convocation, she proudly stood and spoke of how every other job she had been at had been guilty of some sort of flaw where not all were loved equally, or someone was not treated fairly, but she prided our little group.  She even went as far as to say we were almost "utopian" in our lack of judgment on each other.  Oh, friend, how sad you would be to hear of this new incident as it has been brought to my attention.  

I was recently in my place of business, this once "utopian" looking society to find one of my younger peers a little on the mopey side.  After further discussion, she shared with me that one of our other staff members had written her off because of a comment she had made that somehow revealed her as a believer.  

Readers, it made me sick.  Now, just a few weeks prior to this, there was a staff meeting of sorts ADDRESSING THIS VERY THING... only the victim was muslim.  Sucks, right? everyone agreed this was not an okay thing to happen.  And now, a mere WEEK after this previous conversation, almost the same thing occurs, only it is 1) Peer to peer (as opposed to stranger to peer) and 2) The victim was christian.

Maybe I'm crazy, but just because we don't wear head scarves doesn't make us any less immune.  It's STILL ignorance.  And it shouldn't be tolerated. 

My heartbreak happened on so many levels.  One: People who have the similar ideas and views form clubs, where this society, so proud of their "diversity" was built so that we could learn from each other.  It FRIGHTENS me also, that someone with this amount of intolerance is supposed to be representing the University in a positive light.  

As a member of the faith, I know I can let it go because persecution and judgement go with the territory.  However, as a staff member of the University, this issue needs to be addressed.  

The term "University" came from two words "Unity in Diversity", the idea being that diverse minds could come together when practicing the reasons they are diverse (39 Geisler Bocchino).  Clearly in this situation, there was a major lack of that.  It is very unsettling to know that a supposed scholar of higher caliber could be so ignorant, and ACTIVE in their distaste.  

I am not suggesting that everyone agree with me... but I am suggesting that Christians face JUST AS MUCH persecution as our muslim friends.  Friends, the way is not a smooth road, but God promises us that it will be worth it.  

Say a prayer for the offender tonight.  Also, say a prayer for me.  No society is perfect, but one that so easily writes off their peers... I am not sure I want to stay affiliated with such a group.

Ya know, those guys with the signs have a point.

On my liberal campus, I frequently walk by a group of people with signs that often say things like, "REPENT" and "THE LORD SAVES" and "GOD HATES..." with a list of all sorts of sinners listed underneath.  These people with the signs are often shouting things like about how we are sinners and totally screwed up and we need to repent or we will burn eternally and everything we do is wrong.  I often hear about how these preachers are harassed and ridiculed by other christians.  Some students were even so bold as to debate with these preachers with the picket signs.

I used to get really irritated by those preachers.  I thought they were SO off in there thinking because I know that God loves, so how could they have missed the mark.  

And then I read Joel.

Joel, was a prophet out of the Old testament.  And when I started reading Joel with my bible study at the beginning of this semester, I didn't realize what I was in for.  I think its interesting how many Catholics act like the Old Testament is very out dated.  After reading these 3 short chapters, I realized not much has changed since the days in Israel. 

Joel, was a prophet who spends THREE Chapters telling of the wrath of God.  His message is Clear: GOD is pissed.  No, bad word choice.  God, is sad.  And FRUSTRATED.  He is frustrated because he LOVES us.  He gave us all these beautiful things, and then gave us choice.  And guess what we did.  We got greedy.  We needed 2 wives.  We needed not just our sheep, but our neighbors.  And he got frustrated.  

Now, what does sheep and wives have to do with today? EVERYTHING!  In Joel's day, God sent wrath and trample and uproot things to start from scratch.  Today, he doesn't HAVE to because we are SOOOOOO selfish we pretty much have the punishment thing down.  

God calls us out.  He says "Look kids, just 'cuz you are good for an HOUR on sunday does NOT make up for the rest of the week."  

If I hear one more person ask, when talking about natural disaster, "Why is GOD doing this to us?" I might laugh in there face...

GOD doesn't create the natural disaster.  They are Ramifications of STUPID decisions we have made in our selfish attempts to have EVERYTHING.  WE are STILL less than perfect.  FAR less than perfect.  If you turn on ANY "popular" television show you'll see not much has changed: people are STILL sleeping around, lying to each other, and beating up on the little guy.  

And yea, its a harsh message, but guess WHAT: it's TRUE! Those guys with their signs, they *sorta* know what's up.  I can imagine Joel outside some Bazaar back in the day in desperation trying to warn people of God's wrath, and them doing the SAME THING we do today: ridicule, harassing, taunting.  

I never stand around long enough to hear the end of the street preachers today, but I can only hope that they are sending a message of Hope too.  Joel says, after 2 chapters of wrath, "The LORD roars from Zion, and utters his voice from Jerusalem, and the heavens and the Earth Shake.  But the LORD is a refuge for his people, a stronghold for the people of Israel." 

So yea, he's angry.  The same way if your parent gave you something important and you broke it.  But they still love you.     He still Loves you.  But he doesn't like you harassing your brothers and sisters.  

Leave those radicals outside the amphitheatre alone.  They may be extreme, but they aren't wrong.  And guess what? We need to hear it.  

Back with the answer: LOVE

After a long break from my computer I have, without fail, returned to the world of blogging.  I have come back with one simple answer: Love.

 

Seriously, it's so simple. To say (as are most things with this religion, eh?).  Everyone religion, cult, pop icon, random guy on the street has something to say about love:

"All you need is love" - the beatles

"In real Love, you want the other person's good. "- Margaret Andreson

"The only true gift is a portion of yourself" - Ralph Waldo Emerson

" The best and most beautiful thing of the world can't be seen or even touched. they must be felt with the heart" - Helen Keller

"There is no remedy for love but to love more" -Thoreau

but we all know my feelings on words: They are meaningless unless you back it up.  

This Morning in Romans (one of my favorite books) I think Paul pretty much answers WHY everyone seems to be so obsessed with love.  Pauls says that the answer lies in love.  All those countless rules that God puts before us, that Jesus teaches us, all bottom line to the same message: If you can love one another like you would love yourself, All the silly rules fall into place.  Those ten commandments, are redundant if he just started by saying "Love one another as I loved you" because, well can you imagine how the rest of that conversation might have gone

Moses: Ok God, rule one, Love each other the way you love your self... anything else?"

God: Yes, thou shalt not kill...

Moses: uhhh... God, I wouldn't kill me, and I certainly don't think anyone else would want to kill themselves, that seems a little silly... anything else.. 

God: um, yea, no stealing, or lying, or taking your neighbor's stuff

Moses: .... God, seriously, you crack me up, if I am loving my neighbors like myself, I most certainly am not going to be lying to them, killing them, or taking their stuff without asking.

God: well... then, no exceptions to the rule, just love each other.

Wow.  Good work God.  It seems so simple.  the last part being the trickiest: NO EXCEPTIONS.  that is where the teachings come in.  Love everyone: even if they don't believe, are cranky, smell bad, speak funny, whatever.  

All rules have exceptions... except this one.  Love EVERYONE: no exceptions.  :)

Good to be back.  Live it and Love it.  Captain Q, out

You who are so quick to judge...

Friends and readers-

I feel like I must first apologize for being so negligent to posting.  I have a reason (good or not, take it or leave it...) but I have been hearing a running motif over the past week that I feel needs to be addressed.  

I recently had a conversation with a very close friend of mine about faith.  They do not identify with any particular religion, but they were raised non-denominational.  I could not help but wonder what it was that turned them off to the religion, as I am always curious.  I have found in my years of teaching that lots of people turn their back on God when the going gets tough, when I say, if the going gets tough, pull your head out of out of your ego, realize you can't do it alone, and ask for some help... makes sense to me

They gave me an answer about how everyone he knew where he came from was a huge hypocrite.  Fair enough.  We all are... not on purpose mind you, but when you are raised in the church I think its safe to say we all recognize our imperfection, which is why we are there to begin with.  People who are not so familiar often have a hard time coming to this realization.  ANYWAYS,  my friend said they did not want to be a part of a group of people who said one thing and did another.  My friend went on to tell me about a buddy of theirs who writes off people "like us" (meaning artists, who may express themselves through outward appearences).  This is where it gets almost humorous, my friend said their buddy was super conservative though... like a "catholic mormon"... and then I saw them start to sweat... realizing I am a Catholic.  

Fear not friend, I am not about to judge you, because I understand catholics are getting a bad rep... so CATHOLICS, THIS NEXT PART IS IMPORTANT!

We, catholics, know there is no way for said friend could be a catholic mormon... the 2 are like day and night.  When I ask for clarification, my friend said what they meant by that phrase was the conservative judgemental views  that both religious groups had (in their opinion, from what they had experienced...)  

Brothers and Sisters, my heart broke a little when I heard this...  And I feel like my guardian angel on my shoulder wept a little as well... I normally don't discuss my faith or political views with friends, but it was one of those moments I needed to set this poor friend of mine straight about our faith...

Readers, we were compared to mormons... and not in a good, way.  This is the biggest fault in the book.  Friends, "they will know we are christian by our LOVE"... not by our Juicy, our Pradas, or our Egos... Being Catholic makes you SAVED, but by no means does it make you BETTER.   It is not ok to go to church for an hour and then flip someone off on the way out of the parking lot.  And it does NOT make it ok for you to turn up your nose at anyone who is not catholic... JESUS ATE WITH SINNERS AND PROSTITUTES.... WE should BE so lucky that Jesus gives us the time of day (see my last blog for why) 

"But you're not hypocritical, Nat, ur very true to urself... so ur fine."

It's true, I work very hard to stay true to myself, and most people see my tattoos and numerous piercings and then pick their jaw up off the floor once I tell them I worked in the church for 8 years, BUT, I am the biggest hypocrite of them all, right? (see last post again.) Friends point was not that flawless only that I keep it real.  

Well played on me, right? Here's the secret.  Pay attention: Love your neighbor. 

Do it.

Seriously, my grandma once told me "Natalie, the only commandment you need to remember is love your neighbor as yourself.  When you get that right, everything else falls into place"

SO TRUE, Grams! If you love your neighbor the way you love yourself, stealing, fighting, all that isn't an issue.  Which is true.  If you call me say Nat, it's an emergency, I NEED you... you bet your BALLS I will do everything to move heaven and earth to help you out, be it noon, 7 a.m. or 2:30 in the morning... because if I called someone with those words... I hope, nay, KNOW they would do the same for me.  

Friends, WE ARE THE CHURCH... I'll say it again, WE ARE THE CHURCH.  My friend has been wronged, they was either judged or denied something by us, and felt unloved... THAT IS NOT THE POINT.  SHOW ME LOVE.  Words are nothing but symbolic unless you have the action to back it up with.  And I KNOW my buddy is not the only one, I hear it ALL THE TIME.  

to sum it up: be a Catholic with ur heart, huh? And if you ever hear this... don;t be afraid to say something about it... otherwise all the misconceptions are going to keep living.  Stop it in its tracks, tell people we are LOVING, and then you BETTER back it up with your actions!

Good talk, go team!

GUEST POSTER

I know you all have missed the last 2 weeks of Blogging, and to tell you quite honestly, so have I.  However, auditions and school have been getting the better of me, so I actually asked my roommate if I could borrow some of her thoughts for today.  While it is not reflective of this week gospel, it is still amazing, and maybe even more pertinent to ideals of today.  I invite you to read Jolie Milligan's thoughts entitled "I am a prostitue":

I thought the title might intrigue you...

I may not be a prostitute literally but figuratively I'm as used as they come.

My all time favorite book in the bible is Hosea.  I wouldn't call it the most well known or the most read... but it should be.  Despite it's rough edges and hard to swallow accusations there lies a beautiful truth.  

If you are feeling:

Unworthy

Unwanted

Unloved

Heavy

Ashamed

You should read it.

Let me break it down for you.  Hosea is a minor prophet, one of the last in the Old Testament. God asked Hosea to do something crazy; marry a prostitute.  Hosea did it.  He trusted the Lord and took a leap.  He fell MADLY in love with a less than reputable girl named Gomer.  Things were going really well. She seemed to be done with her previous lifestyle... and they had a couple of kids.  God was very specific as to what Gomer and Hosea were to name their children:

Lo-Ruhamah (Not loved)

Lo-Ammi (Not my people)

Hmm... interesting names... can you imagine what Hosea's friends and neighbors must have thought about this!

"Hosea is off his rocker! First he says Gods speaking to him... then he marries that prostitute... now this!? Poor guy, lost his mind!"

Gomer got sick of the home-life and ran off with another man.  Hosea was devastated.  Heart broken. Depressed.  Can you imagine? Someone God chose for you, someone you loved deeply, passionately, someone you would lay down your life for turns their back on you and leaves.  

Hosea is so in love with this woman that he even gives her new lover money to take care of her.  All he wants is for her to be happy.  

So why would God put Hosea through all this agony? To prove a very important point. 

During this time Israel (the people) had been less than faithful to God.  God had gotten down on his knee and asked Israel to be His bride.  She willing accepted this covenant and was so excited to be one with this dreamy God.  But when the honey moon was over she got a little bored and decided to dabble in a few extra marital affairs.  

the israelites would go through the rituals that God had asked them to perform... but they would also partake in other rituals performed by worshipers of other gods.  

God was a broken hearted lover (and still is for that matter).  

We break his heart everyday with things we do.  We put money, work, friends even relationships before Him.  We are no better than prostitutes.  

But there is hope.  

As Hosea was walking in his village he saw a man trying to sell his half naked wife.  God told Hosea "Go show your love to you wife again." He purchased her back for 15 shekels.  The first thing he did was tell her he loved her.  He said that she would live with him and stop this unfaithfulness because she would never find anyone that loved her as much as him.

If there is hope for Gomer, there is hope for us.

Despite our pitiful shortcomings, regardless of our promiscuity, God loves us more than we have the compactly to know.  Even though we break his heart he brings us close to him and says "I still want you".

He brought us back when we were in the arms of another lover.  He did not pay with silver, but rather with blood.  He gave up the life of his Son, Jesus Christ, to purchase us back.  

It is both the heart breaking and the uplifting to know that we are so deeply loved by God.

I'm feeling a bit like a Pretty Woman right now...